Saturday, September 12, 2009

Pretty green bottles

What is wrong with people? When did it start to be okay to try and overrun a waitress? You go to a restaurant to eat and drink, to have a good time. I, the waitess, am there to make your experience pleasurable. I had a duece last night that was pretentious the moment I approached the table. There is nothing more rude than to be completely ingnored when you go to the table. I always start out with "hi how are you this evening" and 5 out of 10 times I am completely ignored. It's like I am not even there, um hello the human being standing infront of you spewing words is trying to get a drink order from you! Here's another pet peeve of mine when I ask you if you'd like a beverage don't say oh no I don't drink. I didn't necessarily mean an alcoholic drink asshole, that's why I said beverage, pay attention. The next one that gets under my skin is oh no I don't want anything to drink I'll just have water. Well unless you plan on taking a fucking bath with the water you are going to drink it! Anyways about the couple from last night. Like I said they were a bit stuck up but overall ok. They were seated in a booth that had a view of a section of the bar that we store the wine. The woman asked me "can you give me one of those empty wine bottles over there". I looked and notice she was looking at wine bottles that have yet to be corked, she was assuming they were empty because the cork wasn't sticking out. So I nicely explained to her that they were not infact empty but waiting to be corked. She got huffy with me and told me that she is need of a green bottle. Ok ma'm but this doesn't change the fact that the bottle is full of wine. I suggested that she could buy the bottle of wine, but of course I am an asshole for this suggestion. So holding back my tongue I try one more time to be cordial and I tell her that I go to a huge flea market on the weekends and I find a lot of glassware there, maybe you could try something like that. That's an honest tidbit of my life that I shared with these customers whom I am just trying to serve food to by the way. The look on her face is priceless, not only is she looking at me like I have 9 heads, she takes offense to the suggestion that she would frequent a place such as a flea market! Well la de dah you stuck up bitch! Take your cheap ass outta here and go buy a cheap bottle of wine then cause I'm out of suggestions for you. Even after her implication that I am less of a person because I frequent flea markets she has the audacity to tell me (not ask by the way) to have the bartender save her one of the elusive green bottles when it is emptied. I tell her I will be sure to do that for her. Fuck you, this post is the closest you will come to getting your precious bottle!

1 comment:

  1. lol. I waitressed during college and shew! I can identify. I used to throw in the towel when a group of old ladies sat down. Thanks for stopping by and even joining my blog! :)