Saturday, September 11, 2010

There isn't a justifiable title for this

Today feels kinda strange. It's of course September 11th and I'm remembering what it means to be an American. I've gone through about 40 emails this morning that all tell me to make sure I have a flag out today. Problem is, I don't own a flag. How truly unamerican is that.

You know it funny, when I was a kid and all the adults were gathered around talking, they used to say things like, I remember exactly where I was when Kennedy was shot. This day is like that now. I remember where I was the day the towers fell, the day when our happy little bubble of ingnorance was busted. I was sitting in a waiting room of yet another rehab center, waiting to be assessed by some undergrad who didn't have a clue as to what a junkie is. I hadn't shot up yet and the withdrawal was starting to show it's ugly face. My nose was running, my body was on fire, I was shivering and sweating, I was moments away from explosive diarrhea and then it happened. Katie Couric and Matt Laur were stunned into silence as the second plane barreled it's way into the tower.

For just a moment I forgot about me. I let go of the selfish junkie monster and let myself feel human again. We didn't know for sure what was going on but it was something. This was no accident. I was literally stunned into a stupor and just sat there watching the tv.

But life continues and today nine years later, I'm sitting in my apartment, miles away from the rehab center, that by the way I ran from, but the feelings and the emotions of that dreadful day are still with me. My heart goes out to the people who lost their loved ones. My heart goes out also to that preacher who thinks that burning Korans is going to somehow make up for the damage that the terrorists created. It isn't the muslum religion that shattered our America, it was asshole terrorists. Burning a holy book isn't going to change that, nor is it going to make any difference whatsoever. All that's gonna do is start a fight that I don't think we're prepared for. Can't we just stop killing and judging?


  1. Wonderful post, my friend.

    Thank you for sharing about where you were on that day. I so admire and respect how far you've come and grown since then.

    (((( You ))))

    I too remember exactly where I was and what I was doing on that day. And what's strange, is that it feels like it was just yesterday - it's so clear in my mind.

    Again, thank you for sharing such a wonderful post.


  2. You speak from the heart... and do it well.

  3. Ron,
    thank you for the hugs! I think we will all remember that day; and what we were doing, where we were at, and what we felt. I agree with you about it feeling like yesterday, it's hard to believe that was 9 years ago! Have a great week my friend.

  4. IT,
    I certainly try to speak from my heart; although, sometimes I think as I'm writing "who's gonna want to read this?" I've always dreamed of being a writer but I just lack the confidence in myself and the discipline to actually sit down to do it. I have a story to tell but I don't know how to sit down and get it out. Thanks for stopping by and commenting on my post. Enjoy what's left of the weekend!

  5. You are an incredible writer, and yours is one of the blogs that I read first when I look at my google reader. It's definitely a "must read"!

    I'm so damned proud of you and the amazing woman you've become. the woman that was always inside waiting for her chance to come into her own.
    Not only are you a good writer and smart and nice and wonderful and probably pretty and good with kids and animals, but you give me hope that people can change and get better. Even though I don't work with addictions and recovery every day anymore, success stories like yours are fantastic reminders that the effort is all worth it.

    now what was this post about again... right. 911. I just don't get the hoopla. We need to remember and respect, but not rejoice and retaliate.

    That's a lot of r's. I should write that down. Put it in a greeting card ;)

  6. Lora;
    You should so send the R's to hallmark, I think this is the only occasion left that they don't make a card for!