Friday, January 22, 2010

Yet Another Waitress Rant

Seriously people how many times must I post about stupid customer questions before they stop asking me them?

So, I have these 2 old bitties in my section last night; I knew I was gonna be in for some trouble when I took a gander at this lady. She had on plastic zebra striped rainboots, a green poncho thing, and a wig that nobody should ever wear no matter what the circumstance ( Halloween couldn't even pull that one off). Ok.

weirdlady: what are the soups?

me: we have wedding and chicken noodle.

weirdlady: do you put sugar in the wedding soup?

me: (thinking to myself, who the fuck puts sugar in wedding soup?) No ma'am there is no sugar in the soup.

weirdlady: are you sure, could you just check with the chef for me?

me: (augh) yes I'll double check for you.

After fuckin around in the kitchen for a few minutes while I'm "double checking with the chef" I come back to the table to reassure her about the soup. She orders it. Then she asks me "is there any cheese in the meatballs?"

Oh for the love of God! Listen up people if you have that many food allergies, pet peeves, or just random annoying problems with what you eat, please please please just stay the fuck home!


  1. I agree! I did the waitressing/bartending thing at TGIFridays for like 3 years. The stupid questions never stopped. Ever. But now they make great stories! Try for the happy place...

  2. haha i used to work in food service as well and it never ceases to amaze me that people actually ask ridiculous questions ALL THE TIME!

  3. When I used to bartend, I got asked all kinds of dumb questions too. I finally just had to start laughing and just humor the idiots, drunk or not. I did learn, however, that the more I humored them, the better tip I would get. XD

  4. The longer I'm around the less I am surprised by people's stupid questions. I used to think that it was because I worked in the service industries, first restaurants, then retail. Now I know that if you are in any one place for a long enough time, some fool will come up and ask you a dumb question.
    The only ways to avoid it are to keep moving or to look stupider. That's why I dress the way I do when I go to WalMart.

  5. Bwhahahahahahahahaha!

    Can I just tell ya how much I LOVE these restaurant vents of your!

    They're freakin' hysterical!

    First, that photo had me cracking up! That's gonna look like ME at that age.

    I can so identify with the stupid questions customers ask me too. Like, "Oh, can you give me discount if I buy TWO?"

    You're right my friend, if someone has that many food allergies, "Stay HOME!

  6. God bless you and your blog.
    I am now a devoted reader!
    Love, SaltyMissJill (veteran waitress/FOH of one dozen years, line cook/BOH of 7)

  7. Yes, yes, yes, yes, the answer is always yes.

    Just in case.

    Oh, and Salty Miss Jill musta come here from my blog maybe! She and I are bloggybesties and I ALWAYS put the two of you together in my head.